The internet can be a wonderland of memes, dance challenges, and puppy videos—but it’s also a place where kids stumble upon some of the darkest corners of humanity without warning, preparation, or a way to hit “undo.”

A new report from New Zealand’s Classification Office sheds light on something most teens already know and many adults are just beginning to grasp: exposure to extremely graphic and harmful online content is becoming a routine part of growing up—and they’re often dealing with it alone.

Researchers talked with ten diverse groups of young people, ages 12 to 25, across the country. Their stories are eye-opening—and a little stomach-turning. What stood out most wasn’t that this content existed (most of us have figured that out), but that so many teens aren’t seeking it out intentionally—it finds them.

When “Just Scrolling” Turns Into Trauma

A male high school student explained, “You can just be in like a server that’s for, like, a game that you like, or a YouTuber or something, and someone can just send something that’s crazy.” Another added, “Yeah, I got sent something of people shooting themselves.”

Most young people said they weren’t trying to see disturbing images—like videos of real-world violence, suicide, or animal cruelty—but thanks to social media, chat groups, and messaging apps, it just shows up. Sometimes they clicked out of morbid curiosity. Sometimes they saw it accidentally. Either way, the result was the same: they couldn’t unsee it.

“I’ve seen gore […] Just out of curiosity,” said one young man. “We went [to a website] […] but there was some bad stuff. So […] we decided not to watch it again.”

Every single group interviewed mentioned exposure to violent or disturbing real-world content. Many also raised concerns about sexual images being shared—whether voluntarily or not.

Seeing disturbing content isn’t just upsetting in the moment—it can have lasting psychological effects. Some described feeling petrified or traumatized, while others talked about thoughts that lingered long after they closed the app.

As one student put it, “Harm can be something that gets on your mind and doesn’t leave it and keeps coming back again and again at times that you don’t want that thought to come into your head.”

And let’s be clear: these aren’t overly sensitive kids. They’re normal teens reacting to a digital world that sometimes throws raw, unfiltered horror into their hands.

Parents’ instincts often lean toward confiscating devices or banning screen time when they hear about harmful content. But young people in this study had a message: that’s not helping.

“It’s recognizing how unhelpful it is ‘cause it’s just like, ‘Well, if you weren’t on that damned phone, then you wouldn’t have seen this stuff,’” said one former Youth Advisory Panel member. That kind of reaction just makes teens less likely to open up next time.

Instead, teens said they need calm, supportive conversations. Not punishment. Not panic. Just help.

One high schooler shared how her parents got it right: “If there’s something gone wrong, I will talk to them first, because I know that they’ll have my back and they’ll sort it out for me. And then, if there are some worries, we’ll talk about it after things are sorted out.”

How Parents Can Help Without Overreacting

So what’s the game plan for grown-ups? Here’s what teens are asking for:

• Reassure them it’s not their fault. This reduces guilt and shame.
• Let them talk it out. Don’t judge—just listen and validate that what they saw was upsetting.
• Ask thoughtful questions. Help them reflect on how it affected them and what boundaries they might set next time.
• Work together on solutions. Instead of banning devices, discuss how they can block or report harmful content, adjust settings, or know when to take a break.

At the end of the day, this isn’t about fear-mongering. It’s about recognizing that growing up online today is wildly different than it was ten or twenty years ago. The internet isn’t going away—but neither is a teen’s need to feel safe, heard, and supported as they navigate it.

The report is a stark reminder not just about what is on the internet, but also what we ourselves post on it. That’s why here at Elevation Next, we always cite our sources and provide science-backed evidence of wholesome information for our reports.

Te Mana Whakaatu. Content that Crosses the Line: Conversations with young people about extremely harmful content online. Wellington, NZ: Classification Office. (2024)

The report can be found here.