They say laughter is the best medicine, but it might also be one of the best parenting tools, according to a new study led by researchers from Penn State. These findings were published in the journal PLOS One.
In a pilot study, the team discovered that most people see humor as a powerful way to connect with their kids. Parents who use humor often have stronger relationships with their children, and those kids tend to look back on their upbringing in a more positive light.
Although humor and play have been studied in various settings and in child development, this is one of the first formal studies on humor’s role in parenting. This preliminary research marks an initial exploration into how humor influences parenting and parent-child relationships. The study lays the groundwork for understanding how to use humor effectively and when it might be less appropriate.
The researchers surveyed 312 people between the ages of 18 to 45, with over half saying they were raised by parents who used humor. A whopping 71.8% agreed that humor is an effective parenting tool, and most said they either do or plan to use humor with their own children, believing it has more potential benefits than drawbacks.
Interestingly, the study found a strong link between a parent’s use of humor and how their now-adult children view their relationship with their parents. Of those whose parents used humor, 50.5% reported having a good relationship with their parents, and 44.2% felt their parents did a great job raising them. In contrast, among those whose parents didn’t use humor, only 2.9% reported a good relationship, and just 3.6% felt their parents were effective.
“There’s an interesting parallel between business and parenting, which are both hierarchical. In business, humor has been shown to help reduce hierarchies, create better environments for collaboration and creativity and diffuse tension,” said author Lucy Emery. “While parent-child relationships are more loving than business relationships, stressful situations happen a lot when parenting. Humor can help diffuse that tension and hierarchy and help both parties feel better about a stressful situation.”
Co-author Benjamin Levi acknowledged that while it makes sense that parents who grew up with humor would use it with their own kids, the stark differences between these groups were surprising.
The importance of humor in producing good relationships cannot be overviewed. While tact maybe something of importance, but one can be serious while keeping it the situation light as well.
L Emery et al. Humor in parenting: Does it have a role?. PLOS One (2024). https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0306311
