Benevolent sexism is the benign and “positive” attitude that men must take care of and sacrifice for women. In other words, chivalrous and “gentlemen-ly” behaviors. While there may be cultural and biological implications for this, often it can be viewed a patronizing, leading to sexual dissatisfaction in women.

Researchers from The University of Melbourne sought to explore this and published their results in Archives of Sexual Behavior.

The study involved a sample of 308 heterosexual women from the US who had sex with a man. The participants completed assessments about benevolently sexist attitudes, adopting traditional sexual scripts of taking the passive role during sexual activity, sexual satisfaction, and sexual preferences for submission.

The results were that benevolent sexual attitudes were not associated with sexual dissatisfaction unless the person does not enjoy the submissive role.

“Since benevolently sexist women value men’s adoration highly, they may actually derive greater satisfaction from the intimacy associated with having sex or the commendation they receive for engaging in sex, rather than from physical sexual pleasure itself,” stated author Sarah Bonell.

“Rather, we contend that autonomy is oppressed in situations where women are denied their sexual preferences. Thus, women should not necessarily be worried if they’re engaging in gender-stereotypic sexual behaviours. Rather, they should reflect upon their sexual norms to establish whether aligning with the traditional sexual script also aligns with their own sexual preferences,” added Bonell.

Therefore, it is really important to pay attention and listen to the preference of the woman that is in front of you, rather than listening to how society wants you to generalize people.

S Bonell et al. Benevolent sexism and the traditional sexual script as predictors of sexual dissatisfaction in heterosexual women from the U.S. Archives of Sexual Behavior (2022). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-022-02318-3