Flirting, as many know, is an important skill and tactic in attracting potential mates. While flirting may be physical or verbal, the more specifics of how effective flirting can be often depends on the the person doing it, the person receiving it, and the setting it is in.
Researchers from Norway set out to study the most effective flirting techniques and published their study in journal Evolutionary Psychology.
For their study, the investigators recruited almost 1000 students in Norway and the United States. Students were randomly assigned to one of four versions of a questionnaire: a woman flirting for short-term sex with a man, a woman flirting for a long-term relationship with a man, a man flirting for a short-term sex with a woman, and a man flirting for a long-term relationship with a woman. They rated how effective 40 different types of flirting were for each of these different scenarios. Other questions on the form included extraversion, attractiveness, religiosity, mate value, etc.
Results show that men and women generally utilized similar flirting tactics for long-term relationship. However, men differed more in their strategies for short-term vs long-term more-so than women. Generosity and seeking attention was considered more effective in the US. Women rated humor to be higher.
Differences included dressing sexy or showing off their body were more favorable when employed by women. On the other hand generosity was more effective when done by men, but tends to be a better telegraph of looking for a long-term relationship than a short-term one. Which would make sense as this shows commitment and investment.
According to author Leif Edward Ottesen Kennair, “People think that humor, or being able to make another person laugh, is most effective for men who are looking for a long-term relationship. It’s least effective for women who are looking for a one-night stand.”
“It is effective to be funny, but for women, it is very important that you show your potential partner that you think they are funny,” added co-author, Rachel Burch.
Overall, for both genders, adding giggling or laughing at the other person’s jokes was considered effective flirting once other basis are covered like smiling, friendly conversation, good rapport, and making good eye contact.
LE Ottesen Kennair et al. Perceived effectiveness of flirtation tactics: The effects of sex, mating context and individual differences in US and Norwegian samples. Evolutionary Psychology. DOI:10.1177/14747049221088011
